Things I Find Weird About Humans.

Being a cat, I'm naturally an observer. I have been around humans all of my life observing as they do some pretty weird stuff! This list is not about any specific humans but about humans in general.

1. The way they go to the bathroom.

Why do they pee and drop their turds into a cold bowl of water? It's completely bizarre! I mean if you drop turds with a large mass, it splashes and leaves you with poop water all up in your giblets. At least create a splash guard! And where does it all go when it goes down the tube? I guess ignorance is bliss with that question.

2. They stand or lay in water to clean themselves.

Water is good for one thing only, and that is drinking. Why do they torture themselves by getting wet daily? Next time when you want to get clean, try using your tongue, it works much better.

3. They don't hunt their own food.

Humans go to what they call a market to get their meats and other weird foods. Their meat always comes wrapped in plastic or in tins. That stuff isn't fresh! The best way to eat it, is to catch it, play with it until it stops moving and eating it right there on the spot. The blood is the best part!

4. They live in groups.

I like my quiet space, so I can sleep and do whatever I want. Do they know that animals who live in herds are prey? Maybe this is why they don't catch their own food. Then you add to the weirdness by all using the same bowl to go to the bathroom in. Why aren't you peeing on your sofa or bed to claim it as yours?!

5. They barely sleep.

Sleep is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Do ever wonder why cats are so beautiful? It's because we get our sleep. I recommend a minimum of 13 hours daily, and that's if you just want to get by.

6. They drink by gulping water rather than licking.

How do you not drown?

7. Using rolls of paper to wipe their butts.

Those rolls are meant for playing, not spreading your poo! That is what the carpet is for! You can create so much art with all that paper. Please stop wasting precious art supplies...think with your eyes not your butt.

Those are just a few things I find weird about humans. I will continue observing although I fall asleep a lot because they can be quite dull.

~Butters